Average Reviews:
(More customer reviews)I purchased this specific lighter as I feel that it represents my views and statements on the world. Yes, world, I have issues. Issues with processes and issues about issues, and issues with the tyrannical subjugation of the masses that corporations force down onto the ... masses of people massing about. This lighter speaks the inner Ben Franklin, who, judging by his portrait on the $100 bill, was quite a mass of a person himself.
Do I want a Wal-Mart world where I'm forced to purchase one of two equivalent brands of sneakers made by the same de facto company? Hell no. Do I want to buy sanitized music that has been pre-approved so that it neither offends nor enlightens? Hell no. Do I want to buy knock-off soda, such as "Mountain Lightning"??? Hell, well, in this case the soda is substantially cheaper and doesn't have as much caffeine, thus I don't get the jitters and sleepless leg syndrome. It's a real condition! Your legs jiggle almost nonstop when you're trying to fall asleep. It's very annoying! And the soda does basically taste the same, I mean, once you get used to the metallic aftertaste that is, oh, and the bouts of intestinal cramping. But saving $0.75 per 12 pack adds up! Especially since I go through a 12er every three days...
Anywhoo....
As a proud American, not an American't, I hold up this lighter and yell out, "I have issues!" at any opportunity I get. Sure, this draws all manner of bewildered looks and even the occasional call to the police, but in the end it's worth it. Because, well, I have issues.
From a technical perspective, this Zippo features the patented clink, or clunk, noise that all Zippos are famous for. My coworkers have readily pointed out that they know when I'm playing with my lighter just by the distinctive noise it makes upon its opening. Sure they yell, "Knock it off, I'm trying to work" or "God that's SO annoying" or even, "You have problems - did you live under power lines as a kid?" but deep down, I know, it's just the green eyes of envy speaking. They want their own Zippo...
My chief complaint is that the lighter fluid dries out far too quickly. As someone who finds smoking distasteful and repugnant, I'm actually in a better position to judge how quickly this thing eats its fluid. A full charge lasts about three weeks. Granted, I still enjoy lighting stuff on fire - usually my HP Office Quickpack Paper, 92 Brightness, 8.5 x 11 Inches, 2500 Sheets, but sometimes I stray into a more metaphorical fire starting. I'll light a fallen tree branch and reenact the primitive dance that my ancestors must have danced upon first discovering fire. Or perhaps I'll light a tea bag on fire and shed a tear in silent memory of the great fire of London or Chicago or of the CVS down the block....
Also, one last point. The packaging description says that this product weighs five pounds - not true. Granted, my He-Man like strength prevents me from accurately judging how much any object under 400 pounds weighs, but the shipping costs indicated that the box only weighed a pound.
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The World Famous Zippo® Guarantee Any Zippo metal product, when returned to our factory will be put in first class condition free of charge, for we have yet to charge a cent for the repair of a Zippo metal product, regardless of age or condition. The finish, however, is not guaranteed. This guarantee gives you specific legal rights and you may also have other rights which vary from state to state. "It works or we fix it for free"?
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